Dec 08 · 2018
This daily brought to you by my wife—you know you’re a control freak when you won’t let the learning thermostat learn, because it might do something without your knowledge.
Dec 07 · 2018
I hate the “fail fast” philosophy.
Dec 06 · 2018
My wife’s weather app chimes when it’s about to rain. It makes me so damn happy.
Dec 05 · 2018
On a number of occasions I’ve stood behind a woman who spends a good 15 seconds digging for her credit card only after the cashier has scanned $150 worth of groceries. I guess she spends that time thinking she could be the millionth customer and everything will be free.
Dec 04 · 2018
Brad Paisley should stick to instrumentals.
Dec 03 · 2018
Is there anything better than a fiddle?
Dec 02 · 2018
There’s a certain inspiration that comes with travel, to come home better in some way—better husband, father, friend, coworker. It’s fleeting. I’d love to bottle it up and use as needed.
Dec 01 · 2018
One of the most uncomfortable situations in life is listening to a song someone plays for me, wanting so badly for me to like it.
Nov 30 · 2018
Everything must be maintained.
Nov 29 · 2018
I often type a sentence and then find I’ve left out a word entirely. I thought it, but didn’t write it.
Nov 28 · 2018
A woman waved at her daughter without pause as she made her way through airport security. It took 20 minutes.
Nov 27 · 2018
It’s cringeworthy to take a perfectly packed suitcase and turn it up on it’s wheels.
Nov 26 · 2018
Contestants on The Voice can’t be that good because they’re never heard from again.
Nov 25 · 2018
The more Christmas lights you put up, the more Christmas lights you put up.
Nov 24 · 2018
Right up there with the wheel, the airplane, and the internet, is the paper towel.
Nov 23 · 2018
Survivor continues to be one of, if not the best show on television.
Nov 22 · 2018
Thanksgiving is the one day of the year Americans acknowledge they’re full and still eating.
Nov 21 · 2018
My infant son can’t hide his love for mashed potatoes, I can see it all over his face.
Nov 20 · 2018
Perhaps you float up out of your body shortly before your death, to spare you any suffering.
Nov 19 · 2018
If I were a doll or toy on the train, I’d get off and walk over the mountain, to lighten the load. It’s the least I could do for The Little Engine That Could.
Nov 18 · 2018
Companies are making new energy-efficient light bulbs that look like old-school, incandescent bulbs. This is because everyone has caught on to the fact that CFL light bulbs are dumb.
Nov 17 · 2018
IKEA, an oversized grocery bag on wheels does not a shopping cart make. Give me a proper basket or give me death.
Nov 16 · 2018
I have at least one curious thought a day. I will document them—interesting, obtuse, things I know, things I don’t. It’s likely I won’t keep up, or will delete this page in a month.